Susanne Winter

I had high hopes of finishing all the planning today.

Well, I had a good start but then the day got away from me.

Still, I decided to count the words I’m writing in my character sketches, plot idea, and settings towards my NaNo-goal as well. It is a mild cheat. I’m still hoping to crack the actual 50,000 words this month with novel words only but if I can’t I’m good with this as well.

So tonight I wrote 578 words.

Mind you, this is the day I should have had 10,000 but then the month isn’t over yet.

In all my waffling over process I turned to Rachel Aaron’s book, „2K to 10K“ again, and am now following her very sensible suggestions. Today I finished Step 1: Get Down What You Already Know, and got started on Step 2 which is the basics of plot, character, setting, and genre. I’m fortunate that worldbuilding on this one will be very light, I’m going with now and here with a little magic thrown in.

I’m hoping to write a little more tomorrow but I’m still in the walk-around-and-think stage of the novel, unfortunately. Which has to be followed by the writ-things-down-and-think stage.

I am at that point in the process of dreaming up a story where it’s hard to gauge if I’m productive or not.

I spent some more time reading about story structure and character, and I had planned to start doing the exercises in Holly Lisle’s „Create a Character Clinic“ (affiliate link) but then I found myself dragging my feet, and procrastinating like crazy.

Let’s just say that I have now taken care of all the admin stuff for my day job, and some household tasks that had been due for days.

And I found that I was stuck yet again in the whole novel-writing process because I couldn’t decide if I should plan or not, and how. I am pretty sure that planning and outlining is a very good thing – up to a point. But I will never be the person who invents a whole new language and several worlds with back history for centuries. That’s not how I tick. I usually make that kind of thing up as I go. For me more planning is definitely the way to go for now.

And I really wanted to do the planning just so because I’d like this to be the start of a new series, and one that will stay interesting for some time, and so I want to get it right. I also would love to write a novel that does not need two years of revision. I want to write fast and well, and have a finished thing after a reasonable amount of work.

The thing my husband reminded me about, the one I keep forgetting, is that I’m not a complete newbie. I’ve been writing for quite some time now, and the manuscripts where I made my really stupid beginner mistakes are sitting right over there in a desk drawer. So maybe, just maybe, there’s a reason why I tend not to do the exercises in the writing books I read. I know I could. No problem. It just doesn’t feel like doing that exercise will help me in finding the story I want.

So I’m thinking that maybe the detailed outline is not my thing after all. I have an idea of my main character, and today while doing the dishes after breakfast I got an inkling of the murder victim. And her daughter. And how the paranormal element might come into it.

I’ll sit down tomorrow morning and write some of it down. And then maybe I can get back to writing first draft soon. Without having to put myself through a ton of exercises, and worksheets and such.

Still pretty exciting this.

Well, a funny thing happened this morning.

When I woke up around 5.30 I had dreamed a new character for a novel. Which does happen.

Since I was so behind on writing – what with the zero words yesterday – I had my laptop sitting next to me so I could start writing right away, first thing in the morning.

And then something in me snapped.

And I decided not to write the novel I had planned.

Oops.

Now normally I won’t advise doing this. Every story feels like crap occasionally when you’re writing it but this time I was not feelint the love at all. I had researched a few more novels in that chicklit/ weight loss/ midlife crisis genre (if that even is a genre – it should – but it might not be), and I had zero motivation to read any of them.

I still think the idea works, and would be fun, and the main character is cool, I only just don’t want to write this kind of book.

So. Change of plans.

I spent the day mostly sitting around thinking about an idea for a new series. And I read „Story Genius“ (affiliate link) some more. And bought Holly Lisle’s „Create a Character Clinic“. Over the next few days I will, um, develop (yeah, that’s the word I was looking for) a series of paranormal cozy mysteries. This time I’ll actually start by creating characters and a world, and an outline first.

And then I’ll write it.

And if things go really great I might even win NaNo but then I tend to be rather optimistic.

Getting a book I love to write out of this might just be a little more important to me than „winning“ NaNo.

Still. I haven’t given up yet. I can always do that later.

And another fun day!

On the bright side I did get the podcast episode published. And I was really glad that I hadn’t moved the recording to today because today – my voice was basically gone.

Now I do know that I have a hard time playing music when I don’t have a voice which is ridiculous but today I learned that I can’t really write fiction without my voice either.

Also I have a headache and an aching throat all day.

All of this makes me think about the advice I read about author blogs that no one wants to read about how hard it is to write. Well, I’m still thinking it is more like moderately hard but today there were no words. And every day with no words is making the rest of the month more interesting and colorful.

I also tried to research books that might be similar to the one I’m attempting to write and found that a) this does not seem to be a genre, which I find weird (but then maybe I looked in the wrong place), and b) every single sample and book I downloaded was one I just couldn’t read. Not that they were necessarily bad, it’s just a kind of book I dislike so much that I don’t want to spend time on it. Huh.

My husband said I needed to invent a new genre. I am a bit doubtful about that. But I’m thinking there must be something I’m missing because I know there are books that deal with the same kind of themes I want to touch. Only I seem to have looked in the wrong place.

Which is completely okay but it made me think for a while that maybe I don’t want to write this book after all.

On the other hand that thought seems to be a normal part of my process. There are people who are just so passionate and enthusiastic that they think their book is the best thing since sliced bread most of the time, and then there are people like me who have an idea, think, „This would be just so cool and awesome!“ and then lose all their enthusiasm for most of the process. Usually when I pick it up weeks later I like it again but while I’m writing it? Not so much.

I’m working on it, though. There must be a way to condition myself to love the process as well.

Unfortunately positive thinking doesn’t seem to work on me. Every time I tell myself how much I look forward to writing this, and how awesome this will be, and how much fun I feel like a kindergarten teacher talking to my inner teenager. It’s eyerolling all the way.

Well, there’s always tomorrow.

And if not it won’t matter anyhow.

Still feeling sick, still procrastinating. And another thing to throw me off my game in the morning. Nothing serious but something that was occupying my thoughts.

That’s the thing with creative work, you need your mind to do it, and when that is elsewhere creativity is harder.

But I did write another 1,513 words.

I’m still way behind, and I’m also hoping to write some more after dinner (just like I did yesterday, and then I fell instantly asleep at 8.45).

Well, I will manage 50,000 words this month at least. Seems like it will not quite be a walk in the park.

Being able to write fast doesn’t really help if you don’t spend time writing. Huh.

So that was a bust.

I think I declare this to be a sick day.

I barely have a voice, and I have started coughing.

Most of the day was spent helping my son get ready for his trip, though, and then sitting next to my phone waiting for updates on his progress. He arrived safely, managed to step on the bus in the wrong direction, and then get off at the wrong stop. It was a realy nailbiter.

He has arrived safely now, but somehow I’m still not in the mood for writing.

So word count still stands at 2,032. Not the 20,000 I had hoped for by now.

I knew it was a stretch goal, didn’t know it would be that hard.